Thursday, April 3, 2014


"This is the start
This is your heart
This is the day you were born
This is the sun
These are your lungs
This is the day you were born

And I am always yours

These are the scars
Deep in your heart
This is the place you were born
This is the hole
Where most of your soul
Comes ripping out
From the places you've been torn" - Switchfoot

I work and I run. I work at a place that replaces one person's heart for another's. One person's lungs for another's. I wake up early and step out into the cold air and breathe in deeply because I have my whole day ahead of me. 

Then one foot in front of another, it doesn't matter the task. I may be running miles or going to work. Both can be equally exhausting. Life is lived one foot in front of another. If you look at it from too far away, the task looks too big, like standing in front of a mountain you have to get on the other side of. You have to choke down the fear and give it a few seconds, then go. Just let go and put out your first foot. Remember to breathe, then remember what keeps your heart pushing blood through your miles of vessels and back again. 

Blood travels through your body in about 1 minute. One cell after another, each carries oxygen to your organs so they won't fail...then to your lungs as you step out the door and breathe that deep first breath of the day air. Imagine being the size of a red blood cell. You could take 1,250 of them and lay them down in a line and they would equal 1 centimeter. Now imagine those same cells traveling your 60,000 miles vessels in one minute, allowing you to take a gasp of air when you are weary. Life goes that fast for us too.

Then you get hurt by something. 

Everything was working fine until you were crushed and scarred. You try to get up but you can't. You make so many mistakes and pray for help and nothing one comes. Breathing becomes labored and your anxiety makes your chest rise shallow. You sit and tap your fingers against things and bounce your knee when you sit. You bite your nails waiting for a verdict on what you've done, but nothing one comes. You just breathe, then remind yourself to breathe. 

Maybe you have travelled too fast. You turned off and hit the gas and now you are lost really far away. Somewhere you took off your cape and became normal. Somehow conformed to what insane people believe is normal. You follow the rules and eat out of duty. You breath incompletely. You stare blankly. You collect what you have earned and sleep lightly, waiting for something to come...someone. But no one ever does. So you try to remember to breathe until you can't anymore.

Life is not about breathing until you can't anymore. This is insanity. Life isn't supposed to be lived normally. Each person has something different inside of them. Let's call it a super power. The most imaginative and revered people this world has known are those that live life abnormally. They refused to give in to conformity or cultural mores. People like Rosa Parks. People like Albert Einstein. People like Neil Armstrong. Have you any idea how much abnormal courage it takes to sit on a bus with demons or move forward in science knowing something isn't right about you, or exiting the earth's atmosphere in a tin can? 

At some point greatness starts with taking a breath and then a step. God is in control of what comes next and you have to trust that. 

Eat because you're hungry.


Thanks for reading...Z