Friday, May 20, 2011

Shutting Your Idiot Mouth

What is at the heart of the disagreement?

This is what you have to ask yourself whenever you find yourself in battle with another human being. Ask yourself, "Why am I so offended by the way this person believes?"

I stopped arguing. Well, almost. I still find my idiot mouth involved in arguments from time to time, but nowhere near the me in top idiot form. I say I was an idiot because of the way in which I would disagree. I was not taking the time to understand where the other person's thoughts were coming from. I would be harsh and drop bombs and stand back grinning and patting myself on the back watching the aftermath that undoubtedly was going to escalate the situation. Then I would take a step back and try to turn it around on you and make it about your anger. Idiot. Eventually I got sick of it. I noticed myself keeping up the argument even when I knew I was wrong, never admitting defeat. That is when I decided to shut my idiot mouth and listen. When I disagree, I try to listen to everything the person is saying and understand where they are coming from. Why is this an important thing to do? Because you are probably speaking to another human being unless you are in the habit of arguing with inanimate objects, which means you are further gone that expected. People see things because of past experiences and beliefs, even if the thing they believe is completely false. We have to understand that our emotions are tied up in our beliefs. Very often, this is why we believe what we do...because our emotions drove us to conclusions that helped us cope. So when we go on the offensive and hurl hate at another of God's precious creation, we hurl insults at God Himself.  Arguments almost always end in anger and resentment.

There is another way. Love. If a belief is wrong, it is probably based in emotion. If you want to help change the belief add emotion to the desired belief. Love is always desirable. Come to a person with respect, dignity, and love and watch them listen to what you have to say. Let the Spirit of God lead them in the direction of truth as you may not have the truth either. But what we know for sure is that God desires we love all people.


Thanks for reading...Z