Everyone has self speak. It is the way you talk to yourself when you are experiencing things like stress, joy, trials, sadness, laughter, despair etc. It is a coping mechanism.
After a fight, we justify ourselves and our actions and play out the scenario as if it went completely different than it really did, at least our ideal way it should have played out, and would have if we had it to do over again.
After a loss, we may blame ourselves, knowing full well we had no fault in the loss, however we do this anyway. Some people like me have the tendency to try to make an already bad situation worse by adding shame to the equation. We tell ourselves things that are not true and sometimes, we begin to actually believe these things.
After a success, it is human nature, not God's, to pat ourselves on the back for our conquest. We like to idealize ourselves and our personal talents involved in the winning of a certain battle in your life. It is really easy to forget, if you are not careful, who gave us everything that is good in our lives. Our talents, our brains, our skills, and our good circumstances were all given to us by God for His purposes and through His love.
After abuse, it is common for the person to blame themselves and every minor mistake he or she has made to justify the actions of the person we love that has abused us. It is our defense and for some, our only defense.
What do you tell yourself when you look at your reflection every morning? Are you confident that you will be OK given any circumstance: That no matter what comes today, God has given you the skills to overcome? Or are you not liking your chances on a day to day level? Maybe you aren't sure you can get through even one more hurdle. Sometimes the fear of the struggle wins before we even consider taking a stand against it.
Studies show that confidence and positive self speak offer more positive outcomes. The self fulfilling prophecy theory. Don't know what I think about that, but I do know that when you are confident in God, you will walk into a tornado and find yourself walking out the other side.
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